I couldn’t understand this album when it came out and I’m still trying to unlock its mysteries.
I couldn’t understand because I didn’t think I could ever matter to this person about whom I have felt obsessive about for so very long. Now that I’ve returned to my inclination of obsessiveness about him —- I think I can see what is coming. It’s weird how life and circumstances beat this obsession out of me and that it returned in spite of myself. It’s not easy feeling this way about a famous rock star. What an abyss and a chasm for someone like me.
"What Is It That I Need That I Don't Already Have?" Lyrics
What is it that I need that I don't already have?
Who was there in the past that I couldn't seem to save?
But will I seem so smart, me and my broken heart
When I am pretending to be brave
What is there up ahead that I can't already see?
Startling as it seems, well, it's supposed to be
Where am I going next?
And if no one objects
Just close the door and that'll be the end of me
What is it that I lost that I don't really need
Some glasses for my eyes
And an hour or two of speed
My hands don't blister, my hands don't bleed
But I'll never be contented, repent or ever be lamented
'Til I'm planted down like rotten crops
And covered up with weeds
What is it that I want that I can't already taste?
A damson from a tree
A girl that I once chased
A girl who ran away and wanted to be caught
Then bade farewell to my love like some merchandise she bought
Things are going up like blasphemous prayers
I burned up all my paper money on those London derrieres
Prayers and paper money will burn until you choke
The things I should have said
They were so easily left unspoken
I didn't break you down
You were already broken
What is it that I need that I don't already have?
Who was there in the past that I couldn't even see?
But will I seem so smart, me and my broken heart
When I am pretending to be free?
When I am pretending to be free
When I am pretending to be free