I kept wondering why there was a barrier, why I couldn’t succeed.

I was told it was because I didn’t have the right connections. But I had been in contact with those who had all the advantages and they wouldn’t help me succeed. They would just afford me the opportunity to prey on me - to exploit and put me down. They’d throw scraps so I’d stick around like they did to their dog.


Are the ritually transgendered the ones reserved for all the advantages that were closed off to me?


When I was a celebrity photographer, I felt acutely aware there was no chance to rise above that level. I could only serve their celebrity glamour beast from the bottom rung.


Do the rest of us look into that ritually transgendered world from the outside? I always knew exactly who they were and that I wasn’t one of them.


I lived in their town. I went to NYU in Paris. Though I went to school with them, their world was closed off to me. The rich do odd things to mark themselves, it seems.