This is part of a series showing letters from Josephine and Hortense. When we last left off, Hortense was heartbroken that Louis would not let her go to her brother Eugene’s wedding out of fear of looking like a cuckold in relation to the untrue rumors that his wife and Napoleon were lovers and that Hortense’s little boy was the really Napoleon’s. These rumors were a huge factor not only in Hortense’s interaction with her husband but also in her relations with her mother Josephine. Josephine was also over the top jealous in her behavior - but she knew Hortense wouldn’t go to bed with Napoleon. This situation was very painful for all involved. Yet we can see from these letters and the letters that Napoleon wrote Hortense that there really was an attachment. Napoleon writes of his “boundless affection” for Hortense and he repeats this theme at St. Helena. Hortense’s obsession regarding Napoleon was one of her predominant traits - which resulted in her rearing, against all odds, an heir who could reassume the French throne.
Dear Eugene,
This January 8, 1806,
I'm learning just now that your wedding is taking place in Munich. There isn’t enough time to make it there. I cannot tell you how much sorrow this causes me. Since I know how much, I only cry.
How? 'Or' What! I will not be near you in such an important moment! Think of me a little, my dear Eugène, because I am the only one to complain. To see you for a moment would have comforted me for so much sorrow! I really needed it, but I hope you will be happy for both of us. Tell your wife about me, tell her how much I love her and how sorry I am not to see her. There is so much said about this marriage that makes me very happy. But how sad she will be to leave her family right away! I am sure that you will replace everything for her when she comes to know you, but you will find her regrets very understandable, because is there anything more sad than to be separated from one’s family?
Show her my letter, I want her to know all my regrets and to love me a little. Write to me, please. Tell me what you think. Make me have a moment of illusion that I am amongst you. Will you come to Paris? My God, how unhappy I am not to be near you!
It seems to me that people no longer love me, that they no longer think of me. Even Mom does not write to me. So she doesn't know how much grief I must have. Everything I order for your wedding pierces my heart, while it should make me happy since it is for your happiness. But I'm not there, and who knows where I'll see you again? There is only you who did not make me sad, who loves me for me, who, finally, is my only consolation, and I will live without you! This idea pains me a lot. I really don't know what I'm writing to you. Don't show my letter, because she may not understand my real intentions, but, you will see all my attachment and sorrow at not being near you.
HORTENSE.
The memoirs so far are available here.